letting yourself feel.

I got inspired to write this post because I got really sad about something I've been dealing with the other day. I'm usually not the type to cry about whatever it was that I was sad about. My body even has a hard time crying most of the time whenever something does make me sad.

Sounds terrible, I know, but that's just how my body is for now.

But, this time I actually let myself cry. I was able to cry and I probably cried for about 5-10 minutes and I actually felt better. I know I'm talking about something that isn't new but I know people tend to forget to let themselves feel out their emotions or like myself, they don't let themselves feel their emotions out often enough.

I can't recall the last time I cried and I felt a little better. It felt brand new to me even though the act of crying and feeling better is not.

I remember I've been told no crying or princesses don't cry. I heard other people be told similar phrases and I know it would leave a bad taste in my mouth. I can't remember a moment when I told someone not to cry when they were genuinely sad about something. I'm not all that great anymore when it comes to comforting a person right away when they start crying like when I was younger but I try.

It's a very humane thing when someone starts crying. They're hurting and as their loved ones we have to try our best to comfort and console them through their troubling times; no matter how annoying it may or will get.

The older I get, I keep thinking about this psychiatrist that I met who I thought was a total bitch. I disliked her from the moment I told her nicely that she mispronounced my last name and she couldn't take me correcting her. Sometimes it takes something as small as such an encounter to get an idea of how a person is going to be with you.

But, something she told me stuck with me. It was that life is going to get more stressful. That was the only thing I took from her because, at the time, I thought I'd be able to tackle anything on my own. I was wrong. I can't do everything on my own but it was scary for me because that's all I know; how to do things on my own even if I'm doing something for someone else, I'd do it on my own. It wasn't until a few years ago that I've been getting better at asking and receiving help. It sounds silly but that's how life is for many people such as myself; we have a hard time asking and receiving help because we've done things for ourselves and on our own for so long.

Whoever reads this, I hope they understand that is it okay to cry. This is a reminder that it is not a form of weakness. It's not. It may feel that way but it's not. You will feel better after you give yourself the time to cry. Along with being patient with yourself to give yourself the time you need to heal from whatever it may be that is causing you the hurt to sad cry in the first place. You will gradually feel better; you just have to trust yourself to slide into your sadness (emotions), become aware of them and figure out a way that works for you in order for you to accept them wholeheartedly. 

There is no guarantee though that you will feel better right after but at least, you let yourself feel whatever emotions you were feeling and you're on a better path of feeling better.

That's all I have to say for now. I know I haven't made a blog post in a few months now and I said I'd come back around the end of March but I'm having too much fun writing my stories. It's this adventure that I'm on and it's something. It's small but it's mine. So for now, I don't have a schedule for my blog anymore. I don't know who was on the ride with my blog but whoever was, I hope they're not too mad about this.

I do plan to post but I don't always have a good idea to write something for my blog. But whenever I do, I will post.

You can follow me on TWITTER @MIDNIGHTHUEE and share whatever is on your mind. Be friendly.

I also have my WATTPAD account where my stories live in case anyone is interested in reading my creative writing. I appreciate the support deeply and truly.

Take everything I say with a grain of salt because you know yourself best. You do.

Smile : ) Try to do one good deed each day and until next time, Take Care <3


                                                                                                                                       Happy Easter : )

2018

I wanted to take the time out for this post and really think about what I was going to say because this is the time for most when they take the time out to reflect. 

I wanted to take this time out to thank those who have been here from the beginning, those who are still here supporting my blog and my writing. You don't know how much it truly means to me and I do my best to keep up with everything, continue to write as often as I can and to put out as much as I can. I really want my writing to reach those in need for them to know they are not alone; there are people out there who care.

I wanted to also say that if you felt like your year was uneventful, it's probably not true; just think about it a little more. When I say that I mean bonding with friends more is eventful, going back to school, a promotion at work, getting a video game you've been waiting for a long time, your physical and mental health improved, all of these things are eventful. In order for something to be eventful, it does not necessarily have to be this big and grandiose event. Appreciate the little things too.

Time is a human construct in order to feel some form of control over their lives. Which I can understand but I don't want others to put so much attention on the year ending and beginning. I prefer everyone to continue to focus on ourselves and doing what we need and want to do. There is a better place waiting for us and we should be working hard and striving to get there as soon as we can but we don't have to rush to get there.

All that aside, use this time however as you see fit; do what you have to do in order to feel comfortable with the new year. One of my close friends spent the day cleaning so that she could start the new year with a clean room. I thought it was pretty cool since I never thought to do that. When it came to me, I tend to go think about who I am, who I want to be and how I can head towards that road to becoming a better me. I don't like going into the new year with expectations because that is how I set myself up for disappointment. I want to go into things with no expectations and take things as they come.

As for the goals I had and completed, I exercised more, read more and learned to love myself more which is more than amazing to me. Those were things I didn't think I would accomplish as soon as I did and I'm more than proud of myself. Even if you didn't complete your goals yet, you should still feel very proud because you're still working towards it. My suggestion for most people is to not focus so much on when you become successful; you probably already are. Focus on you and your loved ones; keep doing what you're doing because you're doing great. Don't worry about the negative things some people will say because people are always going to talk. Ignore them and focus on those who are supporting you because they want to see you continue to succeed. Focus on your mind, your body and your spirit and those around you. Listen to your body, do not neglect it. Do what you have to do in order to stay fine, healthy and fight those who dare to get in the way of your health or your loved one's overall health.

Side note, I remember finding an image that said to write down all of the good stuff that happens to you throughout the year and putting them all in a jar. That way, at the end of the year, you can read them and read about how great your year was. That resonated with me and it is something I am considering to do. Some pretty harsh things ended up happening to me this year and it mostly had to deal with my mental health. It felt like a long road but I'm very fortunate that things went the way that they did.

I wanted to fill this post with inspiration, realism and to encourage everyone to keep being themselves, keep loving your loved ones as hard as you can, be kind, hold onto your mannerisms and keep focusing on what creates your joy. Give back some of the joy when the time comes. It doesn't cost a thing to give kindness and be kind to someone to help them smile. Keep loving yourself and continue to be understanding with yourself and give yourself all the time you need. If you keep working hard, you will get rewarded when you least expect it; just keep being you.

I'm going to end things here and I hope everyone keeps heading forward for their better future. Don't worry about the time, you're doing great. Keep going. Keep fighting and go into the year as a positive force.

Please follow me on TWITTER @MIDNIGHTHUEE and share with us how you intend to make the holidays better for someone.

I also have my WATTPAD account where my stories live in case those may be interested in reading my creative writing. I appreciate the support deeply and truly.

Take everything I say with a grain of salt because you know yourself best. You do.

Smile : ) Try to do one good deed each day and until next time, Take Care <3

And, Happy New Year, Everyone. Let's have a great year together <3

Give Yourself a Break

It is very important for us to give ourselves a break or else we will burn-out and be of use to no one including ourselves.

We need to make it a habit to give ourselves a break whether that is asking for a personal day, making sure do partake in our hobbies on a daily or every other day basis or just doing the things you love to do and just only doing that for a period of time.

We all work hard and that is great. The issue is, we work too hard for too long. I've seen plenty of people who are burnt out or are going to be burnt out very soon and that isn't good at all for anybody. We always want to feel full of energy and be lively which is great. But that does not mean that we always have to be that way. We can schedule days for ourselves where we are just relaxing or spending time with the people we love.

Yes, we do have our days off but sometimes two days just isn't enough. And that's to say if you even have two days off. I know some people who either have one day off or have no days off which is terrible. 

Everyone needs a breaks from time to time.

I wanted to take the time to write about this because I have not been giving myself enough time to have a break. I used to have my two days off every week when I was in college and it was exactly what I needed. But then I started socializing more and it really took it's toll on me over time. I found myself tired almost all the time at a point. That was when I knew I had to socialize accordingly or else I wouldn't be able to do much of anything because I wouldn't have enough energy for it. I also work a lot more now and this is where I have been learning a lot more again about giving myself the days I need to recuperate.

As I said, we need to take care of ourselves in the best of ways because not a lot of people can. Yes, our loved ones do take care of us and make sure we are grooming ourselves properly, eating, and drinking enough water.

But when it comes to knowing our own limits, our loved ones are not always going to notice that. It is important to learn about ourselves more, figure out our limits, and know when to give ourselves a day off or more than a day if needed. Also! It's very important not to feel guilty about it either. I knew it took me some time to not feel bad about not going to work. I know I work very hard and I'm sure many of you do too if you end up feeling bad about not being at work. Give yourselves the time off you deserve!

Take your days off, rejuvenate yourselves, and get ready for the week ahead, it's gonna be filled with a lot of great stuff to do.

I'm going to end things here. I didn't want this post to be too long today because I've noticed that some of my posts turn out to be much longer than anticipated so I'll do my best to hand out some shorter ones once in a while.

Please follow me on TWITTER @midnighthuee and tell me what do you do on your days off.
I also have my Wattpad account where my stories lives in case those may be interested in reading my creative writing. I'd appreciate the support deeply and truly.

Take everything I say with a grain of salt because you know yourself best. You do.

Smile. Try to do one good deed each day and until next time, Take Care <3

you're more than enough.

I wanted to take the time out to make this post for those who are currently not feeling like they are not enough. People out there who feel like what they are doing might feel like it is not enough when all they've have been doing is trying. I want to let you know that you are not the only one but you are doing enough. You are doing your best to be the best version of yourself. We keep hearing that we should strive to be the best versions of ourselves but no one is going on about how hard it is. Some people might be but I don't think enough people are deeply talking about how hard it can be to be our best selves. Sometimes it feels constantly difficult to be the best 'us' we can be because our best may not be 'the best' at times. 

It fucking sucks.

We wake up early every morning and we don't see the results we thought would occur from our hard work from the night before. We work hard all day and we feel exhausted by the end of the day; sometimes we don't feel like there is much of a change in our lives. We feel like all of our hard work is going nowhere and we continue to feel drained.

Some of our jobs are sucking us dry and we continue to give and give and we feel like we are receiving nothing in return; not even a thank you. And you know you're doing a lot. Whether it is for your job, your friends, your family, you spouse, the random homeless person you're always giving dollars to, you're doing a lot.

But guess what? Even though it might not feel like you are enough in this very moment, you need to tell yourself you are because you are enough. You are doing so much for others and yourself. There had been so many times when you put others ahead of yourself and you did not feel appreciate enough. In those moments, appreciate yourself because you know what you did. Tell yourself good job and keep things going for yourself. Yeah it might be silly at first to tell yourself, "good job. Keep up the good work" but you know you did. You know you did do a good job! Hell! You did a great job! 

Why is it so silly to tell yourself what anyone else would when they recognize good work and effort being given?  

When something didn't workout in your favor but you know you did everything you were able to do in your power, tell yourself that it's okay but it was enough.

It's okay to be sad because something didn't work out. Of course you are going to be sad and bummed out for a while. Of course we are going to be sad and bummed out for a while because it was something you truly wanted and you thought things would be different this time. Sadly, this time things were not so different. Again. But it is okay even though its not okay right now. Overall, things are okay because you still have some type of income coming from somewhere, you have some kind of family, you friends, and most of your health.

Aging is a hell of a thing.

So you are enough. You did say enough and you did do enough. You did enough for the person you were in the moment. I'm writing this stuff out for us to not continue to be so hard on ourselves. We have to learn to be gentler with ourselves and try to blame others for their wrong doing. We cannot continue to have the mentality that we are always the one at fault. Sometimes we are but other times we are not at fault and we have to get better at pointing it out. We have to become more comfortable with pointing out other people's short-comings because who else is going to defend us? Someone might but that is never a guarantee. We have to become more comfortable with advocating for ourselves because we have to be the first person to love ourselves and to have our own backs.

We have to be selfish sometimes and put ourselves first. We especially have to do that when we are being disrespected. That does not mean we fight fire with fire. That means we found our balanced way of pointing out things that we are not comfortable with. Even if we don't get it right the first time it is more than okay because we have our whole lives to get it right and to become more comfortable. Yeah it's embarrassing but how bland would life be if we couldn't experience different emotions in different moments?

You are more than enough. Remember that. Do not let anyone tell you to your face that you are not enough and let them get away with it. You are always enough. We are always enough.

I will end things here.

Please follow me on TWITTER @midnighthuee and tell yourself and your loved ones that they're enough and give them a big squeezing hug. Trust me, it works.

Smile. Try to do one good deed each day and until next time, Take Care <3