Sunday, September 24, 2017

you're more than enough.

I wanted to take the time out to make this post for those who are currently not feeling like they are not enough. People out there who feel like what they are doing might feel like it is not enough when all they've have been doing is trying. I want to let you know that you are not the only one but you are doing enough. You are doing your best to be the best version of yourself. We keep hearing that we should strive to be the best versions of ourselves but no one is going on about how hard it is. Some people might be but I don't think enough people are deeply talking about how hard it can be to be our best selves. Sometimes it feels constantly difficult to be the best 'us' we can be because our best may not be 'the best' at times. 

It fucking sucks.

We wake up early every morning and we don't see the results we thought would occur from our hard work from the night before. We work hard all day and we feel exhausted by the end of the day; sometimes we don't feel like there is much of a change in our lives. We feel like all of our hard work is going nowhere and we continue to feel drained.

Some of our jobs are sucking us dry and we continue to give and give and we feel like we are receiving nothing in return; not even a thank you. And you know you're doing a lot. Whether it is for your job, your friends, your family, you spouse, the random homeless person you're always giving dollars to, you're doing a lot.

But guess what? Even though it might not feel like you are enough in this very moment, you need to tell yourself you are because you are enough. You are doing so much for others and yourself. There had been so many times when you put others ahead of yourself and you did not feel appreciate enough. In those moments, appreciate yourself because you know what you did. Tell yourself good job and keep things going for yourself. Yeah it might be silly at first to tell yourself, "good job. Keep up the good work" but you know you did. You know you did do a good job! Hell! You did a great job! 

Why is it so silly to tell yourself what anyone else would when they recognize good work and effort being given?  

When something didn't workout in your favor but you know you did everything you were able to do in your power, tell yourself that it's okay but it was enough.

It's okay to be sad because something didn't work out. Of course you are going to be sad and bummed out for a while. Of course we are going to be sad and bummed out for a while because it was something you truly wanted and you thought things would be different this time. Sadly, this time things were not so different. Again. But it is okay even though its not okay right now. Overall, things are okay because you still have some type of income coming from somewhere, you have some kind of family, you friends, and most of your health.

Aging is a hell of a thing.

So you are enough. You did say enough and you did do enough. You did enough for the person you were in the moment. I'm writing this stuff out for us to not continue to be so hard on ourselves. We have to learn to be gentler with ourselves and try to blame others for their wrong doing. We cannot continue to have the mentality that we are always the one at fault. Sometimes we are but other times we are not at fault and we have to get better at pointing it out. We have to become more comfortable with pointing out other people's short-comings because who else is going to defend us? Someone might but that is never a guarantee. We have to become more comfortable with advocating for ourselves because we have to be the first person to love ourselves and to have our own backs.

We have to be selfish sometimes and put ourselves first. We especially have to do that when we are being disrespected. That does not mean we fight fire with fire. That means we found our balanced way of pointing out things that we are not comfortable with. Even if we don't get it right the first time it is more than okay because we have our whole lives to get it right and to become more comfortable. Yeah it's embarrassing but how bland would life be if we couldn't experience different emotions in different moments?

You are more than enough. Remember that. Do not let anyone tell you to your face that you are not enough and let them get away with it. You are always enough. We are always enough.

I will end things here.

Please follow me on TWITTER @midnighthuee and tell yourself and your loved ones that they're enough and give them a big squeezing hug. Trust me, it works.

Smile. Try to do one good deed each day and until next time, Take Care <3

Monday, September 11, 2017

Damaged People Dating

I needed to take the time out to write about this because this is something that I learned about a couple months ago.

First, I want to specify what I mean by "damaged" people dating. Damaged people, for example, is a person who just got out of a serious relationship and think that they can jump into a new serious relationship and that could be for a number of reasons.

A person who is damaged needs time to heal but they may not realize that at first and may think that finding someone new is what they need in order to heal and sometimes that may work for some if that was talked about and established. Communication is vastly important for just about every situation having to do with human interaction.

People who just came out of a serious relationship are emotionally exhausted. They gave so much of themselves to someone else and it did not work out in the long run. I'm not saying these are people to avoid at all but it does not hurt to point out to them over and over that they need time to be on their own and to heal up if being in a serious relationship is their end goal.

But if they do want to be with someone else, if they feel that may help, they need to pick who they spend their romance with carefully because it sounds better for them to be with a person who wants something more casual compared to a person who wants to seriously date.

The upsetting part is that there are people who are still "damaged" and may be seriously trying to date but skip over the fact that they just got out of a serious relationship. That type of situation is not fair to the other person but life is not about being fair; it's about learning. Sadly, these situations are going to cause some pain and yes, it does suck.


It could have all been avoided if the "damaged" person was just honest about their life situation sooner in order for the other person to make an education decision on whether or not they want to continue things with said "damaged" person.

One suggestion I do have is to not be afraid to ask a person you think you may want to date about their previous relationships. That is something to always ask when getting to know someone romantically anyway. It is important to ask questions in general about information that is important to you in order to find your peace of mind and security. 

Before I wrap this up, I just want to stress that these are not people to avoid at all. If anything they can be great friends, need their friends and healthy friendships to get over their breakups. Although, it is very important to be mindful of other people's emotions if avoiding unnecessary hurt is the goal and to try to be as honest as possible about information you know is or may involve another person.


Please follow me on TWITTER @midnighthuee and tell me when people thought you were functional when you mind was too busy saving itself from itself.

Smile. Try to do one good deed each day and until next time, Take Care <3

Monday, September 4, 2017

Mental Illness does not equal Creativity

I have been seeing and hearing for years that creative people write their best stuff when they are experiencing depression for example or when they are in a very low point in their lives. I am alongside with all of the people who disagree. As someone who has been writing since I have been very young, I remember writing a lot of stuff whenever I was in a good place mentality.

I have not been in a great place as of late and while I was a teenager. I did not write anything I was proud of when I was a teenager dealing with the aftermath of being bullied, growing up and not knowing how to deal with the fact that I was bullied for so long. 

It was not that long ago that I lost my drive and will to write out my posts for my blogs and lost the motivation to work on my stories because of me, not so long ago, experiencing depression.

The media has done a very good job of showing people that great things can come from painful times and that may be true for some but I doubt for most especially when it comes to mental health issues. When someone has a mental health issue, our bodies become to preoccupied with tending to said mental issues and making sure we can function and not die.

I also have a handful of creative friends as well who have gone through their own mental issues that prevented them from making any type of art. I remember we would have conversations about how they felt so sad or they felt so unmotivated that they either couldn't come up with anything good or whatever ideas they did have, they felt it was not good enough to show. Something I can relate to on a very deep level.

Having mental health issues and experiencing them are terrible experiences. My depression was so bad that I remember thinking that I would not wish those types of emotions and emptiness of emotions on my worst enemies; no one wants to feel that way. Most people definitely cannot squeeze out anything creative when they are in such a bad head space. It can become such a struggle for some to just get out of bed or even brush their teeth so imagine trying to write out an elaborate book series or even just one chapter or even just one blog post.

So when it comes to creative people making some type of art whether it is a TV show, a story, a drawing or a painting, we did not make it when we were in a terrible or bad head space., we made those pieces of art when we were in a much better place with ourselves mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually.

I will end things here. I know it was rather short but I do not think there is more to say on the matter for now. We are note creative when we are dealing with a mental or emotional issue; we just can't. 

Please follow me on TWITTER @midnighthuee and tell me when people thought you were functional when you mind was too busy saving itself from itself.

Smile. Try to do one good deed each day and until next time, Take Care <3