Thursday, February 25, 2016

How Discouragement Can Affect Us.

Today I wanted to talk to you guys a little about not having to have your entire future planned out. You guys don’t even have to have tomorrow planned out completely since some people are better at planning things the day off. Others though, prefer to have a plan in at least a day in advance. Everyone is different therefore does just about everything differently. Due to something that happened with me earlier, I decided to leave that topic for next time and talk about a different topic; getting discouraged.

I felt this topic is very important now because I never truly knew how deep it could hit a person until I felt deeply hit today. I was on the phone with one of my former professors and I ended up not handling the phone conversation well after we hung up. I honestly just sat on my bed for about half an hour pondering on the conversation and I am still not sure why I just sat there. Obviously, the whole conversation discouraged me on my plans on one day applying for a graduate program. I mainly called about my grade because I wanted to know how to better myself for the next graduate courses I will take in the future. As I am here typing this out for you guys to read, I am thinking that I could be feeling these feelings because of my cycle. I will not explain exactly what my cycle is but all the women and some men out there will understand what I mean. So I’m here thinking that probably it’s my cycle amplifying my sadness into something much deeper which is known to happen. Although this is something that will pass for me, this is an emotion, this feeling, these sensations, that other people could be feeling on a daily basis which is another reason why I wanted to talk about getting discouraged.

Even though for me I will get over it by tomorrow or even later on tonight, there are people who do not get over feelings like these in a day or less. There are people out there who are very sad and who constantly feel like how I felt today but on a daily to weekly basis or even longer. When I was on my train ride to work, I ended up having very scary thoughts pop into my mind that I never dare to think because I would never do anything to myself that would hurt me; I love myself too much and I love my friends and family members too much. I even decided to do a little research on the thoughts I had and I read people talking about those things and such depressing actions as if it is their norm. The reason being, that it is their norm. Those people are used to talking about their depression because they are living with it. Some people are talking about doing very bad things to themselves because they have gotten so used to it. I was terrified out of my mind that my mind was so preoccupied at work today; I felt like I couldn’t focus all day. Now that I am home, relaxing, and being able to type away to figure out my thoughts and feelings, I’m getting better and I am going to stay better.

Other people though may not get better as fast as me because all of our brains are wired differently. This is something that my mentor and I constantly talk about; our brains and how different everyone is. She keeps bringing this up to me because over the years my patience with people have decreased to the point where I can be known for being impatient and even pushy at times when I feel someone is being too slow with something I feel they should be faster with. My mentor though, has been helping me to get my patience back up because I will forever meet people who do need more time than me. There are going to be people who need a whole lot of more time than me and/or most people I know because of their past or even their present situation.

I felt that I needed to take the time out to talk a little about this because this is something that is very important that I lost sight of because I haven’t been having a good week because I am on my cycle and my emotions and hormones are all over the place; I am not happy.  And, it is more than okay to say and express when you are not happy but as I may have mentioned before, hearing things out loud compared to saying things in your head makes you feel different and helps to make your feelings more concrete than abstract.

My thoughts on all of this is to continue to be as kind as possible to everyone or anyone you meet because someone is always fighting something even if it isn’t always visible to the human eye. Smile because a smile, even from a stranger, can make someone feel a little bit better. Help out. If you see someone in need and you know you can do something about it, go for it. Be smart and aware of your limits as well. If you know you can’t run so fast or if you may not be strong enough to lift something then stay aware of that. There are millions of ways to help other people even if it’s by donating 5 dollars.

Well, I think here is a good place to wrap things up. Thank you for those who make their way into my blog and actually read my posts, even if it’s just a little bit, I still deeply appreciate it.
Please follow me on Twitter so that you guys can leave me comments and tell me how my posts are coming along and/or how I can improve them. I want to hear for you.

Twitter: @midnighthuee

I am still not sure if those who read this blog are able to leave comments or are even able to follow but on my Twitter let me know if you cannot and I will fix it as soon as possible. Thank you again to those who read my posts. Means everything to me.


Until next time. Take care <3

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Find Your Inspiration.

I know there are people out there who struggle day to day when it comes to just about anything. They may struggle to get out of bed or even figure out what to put on in the morning. I know there are some people struggling because they may not know that there is plenty of things and people to live for. There are beautiful flowers to see and smell. Many of wonderful food to go out there and try for the first time with people you love. I decided to open this post this way because you can find inspiration anywhere throughout the world. I know in your room right now you may feel like there isn't much but there is. Try looking around your room or anyone where you visit often and do your best to spot something you enjoy.

When I go to work, what makes me the happiest is seeing all the bookshelves filled with wonderful books. I love books and I love seeing bookshelves filled with books. It inspires me to buy more books, read more, and to better my writing anytime I bump into a book that is written so well that I can't put it down. I started reading the The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain. I know it's an old book but I've never gotten a chance to actually sit down and start reading it. It's a very old book and the English language has changed dramatically but there's a charm to reading how our language used to be in the 1800's. It's something small but finding a good book can put the biggest smile on my face when I wasn't feeling too hot. Finding your muse is important because when you too are not feeling so hot, it is possible for something you love to put the biggest smile on your face too.

It may sound small but you may notice soon enough that other small things such as a piece of chocolate or for you guys who do not enjoy chocolate, a strawberry treat maybe or whichever flavor is your favorite, may make you feel tons better.

Whatever inspires you can and will do the same. I'm not sure if it will make you feel better every single time but that possibility of making you feel better some of the days won't go away anytime soon. Find whatever makes you smile. Find something that helps you keep moving forward until you reach point B because as humans, we do not always want to stay on point A. Listening to music can inspire you to make music. Reading a good book, such as I did, can inspire many to improve their writing or even start a book. Trying out a new device can inspire anyone to build one of their own. 

When listening to a person, similar to yourself, who is just as passionate about something you enjoy, can help you become inspired too. 

I'm going to stop here guys since I'm not feeling so hot today but I didn't want to leave you guys hanging. I wanted to give everyone something to read until I started feeling better. I know I should be fine by Thursday. 

For those who do have someone to go to for inspiration of maybe a song, keep doing what you're doing because I'm sure you guys are being your best amazing. For those who feel they don't have a role model of some sort of maybe doesn't have a song or book to go to, be your own role model because no one will know yourself as well as you. Be your number one cheerleader and be there for yourself when you're not feeling so hot like how I am not. I went straight to the pharmacy to spoil and treat myself and told myself to relax and just watch TV. Your other option is to explore, look around until you find something that makes you smile because everyone can find their muse and inspiration anywhere. Treat yourself like the Prince or Princess that you are and enjoy the rest of your day.

Until next time. Take care, everyone <3

Thursday, February 18, 2016

Your Dreams.

Hey everyone


I hope everyone’s week is going well.
Even if it isn’t, try to remember 5 good things that happened today or this week and notice that smile start to form. If your smile still doesn’t appear then think about bunnies because who doesn’t love bunnies. I should even include a few pictures of bunnies just for you guys to enjoy <3









I wanted this post to be about your dreams or even something that you are passionate about. This week at my job is career week for the girls and on Wednesday we had guest speakers come in. Considering that this is an all girl after school program we had women professionals come in to speak to the girls. We had one scientist who specializes in genetics and three architects.


It was so awesome to listen to these wonderful smart women and to hear about what they do for a living. It was super inspiration for me, a person who wants to help others and is still trying to figure out how exactly to do so. The issue for me is that I am very good at many things and I am not quite a master at anything yet. I am not saying to brag or anything but I am very adaptable to many environments so it is a matter of me picking what exactly I want to do and sticking to it.


These women are in very good places in their lives when it comes to their careers because they get to do something they love and also challenging. They have to to figure out problems that not just anyone can solve and I thought it was absolutely amazing and even though these professionals were here for the girls I took so much from their presentations too.


I wanted to talk about this because I know not a lot of people read my blog but this is something that I want to stick to because I want to be like those women, I want to solve problems that are challenging and I want to help those in need. I am telling you guys to do the same. I know everyone has some sort of dream(s), I know everyone has something that they are passionate about whether it is writing, reading, vlogging, blogging, making videos, animation, wrestling, makeup, video-games, medicine, art, fashion, whatever it is, go for it. My passion is writing but I wanted to do something a bit more practical that can help pay the bills and such but writing isn’t going to go anywhere for me; it will always be there with me. I am doing psychology because it is something I fell in love with and I am very thankful for psychology because I discovered so much about myself through studying psychology. I am here being able to write out my words for others to see because of psychology so many thanks to psychology.


Do not give up on your dreams and do not give up on your passions. There will always be people who tell you that you cannot do something because they do not see you doing it but if you see yourself doing it then you can. The first step to success is envisioning your success. I am telling you because I listened to three stories of three women who knew they wanted to become an architect and they did it. The scientist also spoke a little about herself and how she got to where she is and none of them talked about the people who told them no. They talked about going towards their goals and what they wanted to do with themselves and everyone reading this should do the same. Set goals of where you want to be and work towards it. Also, be friendly.


You will be surprised of where you will end up when you are friendly towards others. I promise you because I have made many friends just from being myself and being a nice and friendly person. Next thing I knew, I'm being told about volunteer opportunities, telling me about where to get a job or offering to meet with other people because they feel that I should be networking with that person. These are things that I never thought could happen to me especially how I grew up but being myself, being a nice person and easy to talk to have gotten me pretty far and I will only keep going forward. That is why I stress to be yourself because that is how you are going to meet the people who are meant to come and stay in your lives. Keep in mind though that it does take time. I remember telling one of my girls who is struggling to find friends that I did not find my best friends until I turned 16. I had another best friend prior but we grew apart. As sad as that is, that is life and it happens but what matters is what you do and not staying in that moment because everything waiting for you is in the future and present, not your past.


Dream your dreams, set your realistic goals one step at time, smile, and be yourself.


I am going to stop here.


I am still not sure if you guys, those who read my blah blog, are able to leave comments. If you are then leave your comments below, tell me how I’m doing.


I also have a twitter account where you guys can follow me and leave me comments there too. That way, I can know how you guys are doing and give me ideas on what to write about.


https://twitter.com/Midnighthuee


Until next time. Take care <3

Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Having good behavior.

I decided to write a post about behavior because today at work, a lot of my girls were misbehaving because they thought because there isn't any school this week that they can behave however they like. Most girls are highly aware of how they must behave no matter where they are. They know that in order for them to have fun and such, they must behave well and that consists of listening to the staff and in order to listen one must be not talking over the other person. Apparently, it was quite a challenge getting the girls to be quiet and some was fooling around which is okay the first couple times but if it keeps happening then they become too disruptive for the other girls. That also gets to a point where the other girls start to imitate each other and then everything is a mess.

I am not saying all this to complain about work or my girls because I love my job and I've grown to love the girls very much. I am taking about this because I know when it comes to good behavior, it goes a long way. This also applies to everyone when applying for work and such or even being recommended for a job position. Those hiring and such are going to pick those who they can work with, speak with, and one who is easy to cooperate with. I have never met a person who hired another person who spoke over them or one who was not being cooperative.


This is something that will relate to all ages. This may be something that we may not be so mindful of especially those who normally feel that they behave very well with other people which is probably the case. There are some people who do certain things that may be inappropiate but they may not know it because no one has told them otherwise so they think they are behaving alright when that may not be the case.


If you see someone not being on their best behavior, it does not hurt to take them to the side or tell them right there and then in a gentle voice that what they doing is not appropriate and describe to them what is a better way to behave with other people. 


I know there are some people who do not want to hurt other's feelings and such but it will hurt more coming from a harsh stranger than a gentle friend. It's all about helping each other.


I know some may be reading this post and thinking that they are aware of all these things and they don't have to change a thing about them when that is not true; there is always room for improvement over time. Plus not everyone is aware of what good behavior really is. I had a girl in class today who kept interrupting the teacher during her lesson and she thought that she was doing was okay until her mother came in and scolded her in front of her peers. Her mother explained to me that her kid was very excited about something and got carried away but obviously that was no excuse to be disrespectful to the teacher. There are some parents who would not tell their child that what they were doing was disrecptpful which may lead to them behaving like that again because they was not told otherwise. This is important not just with children but also with adults. Tell you friends when they're doing something that is not cool because they are likely to do it again and we're trying to make this world a better place. I know I may sound corny but it's true, it is our world so lets take the initiative and do our part to better things.


I can go on but I am going to stop here. I just wanted to talk a little about this because behaving with manners and being polite is something that is very important to me. One of my pet peeves is when something is being very impolite to another human being. It's not col being rude to someone. It's ugly and very mean. Hold the door open for each other and say please and thank you, people really appreciate hearing please and thank you.


It can really brighten someone's day.



Until next time guys. Take care <3

Friday, February 12, 2016

Makeup Review 001 L.A Girl & Eyeko

Hello everyone!

I hope everyone’s week has passed by well and everyone is feeling good.

I am actually a bit sick and cannot think of a topic to write about so I am going to take the opportunity to review eyeliner that I favor.

The eyeliner that I have been using for a long time now is L.A Girl’s fine line liquid eyeliner. I personally love it especially since it is really affordable with the price being $5.99 and can be found at just about any beauty supply store. L.A Girl also has “Mark My Eyes” liquid eyeliner which is the fat eyeliner which is usually used for a more dramatic and bold look.

I received Eyeko’s fat liquid eyeliner in the mail since I subscribed for BirchBox and I instantly fell in love with the eyeliner because of how smooth and bold this formula is. It is the darkest black I have ever had for a liquid eyeliner and the brush is really soft. The skinny and fat eyeliner cost $18.00 but costs $16.00 now on Birchbox.com


Here are the links for Eyeko liquid eyeliner and L.A Girl’s eyeliner if you prefer online shopping. I recommend them both highly but if you cannot afford Eyeko’s then try L.A Girl’s liquid eyeliner.

I know this was a short review and I intend to get better at them. I plan to look through the products I own and use that way I can share with you guys who bothers to read my very small blog. Thank you.

As I mentioned, I have subscribed to Birchbox and also Ipsy. If you guys are not familiar with either of those companies then look them up, they’re awesome. So some of the products that I received samples for are a bit on the pricey side so I intend to look around for an affordable alternative but still getting a similar quality out of the products. I will also do my best to share alerts on sales and such since that is when I normally shop; when a sale is happening. I am always on the lookout for an awesome sale.

If anyone knows any affordable products and where to get them, share. We’re a family here and sharing is caring.


I will end things here. I hope everyone has an awesome and safe weekend. As I mentioned in my Valentine’s Day post, I am very sorry for posting late. As I mentioned above, I got sick again and have been slow with things. Next week will go back to the regular schedule of posting on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Alright, everyone, until next time. Take care <3

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

Valentine’s Day is this Sunday and I’m sure everyone is just about prepared to celebrate with their loves ones.

I know I can say that last year was not the best Valentine’s for me because both my best friends had previous engagements I did not know about and I assumed we were going to spend it together since we did not get to spend it all together the year before. Then I ended up not having any plans and spending it at home all day. Not the best way to spend Valentine’s Day or any holiday but we grow and learn from it and plan ahead to prevent stuff like this from happening again.

This year I snagged both of my friends weeks prior to make sure we spent it together and even though we do not have a solid plan A, we have a solid plan B. Plan B is to have them over my place for wine, movies, and games. Especially since the weather here in New York is going to be very cold. This is not the first year either that it was very cold on Valentine’s Day.

I wanted to suggest some ideas for both friends and couples.

Suggestions w/ friends:
  • Movie Night
  • Wine tasting
  • Going to a club or lounge ( Drink responsibility )
  • Dinner ( try a new type of cuisine you've never had before )
  • Going out to the movies ( Deadpool coming out )
  • Bowling
  • Karaoke ( that was another suggestion among me and my friends )
  • Finding an arcade
  • Throwing a Valentine’s Dance Party
  • Morning walk and grabbing a cup of coffee ( it’s not cold everywhere on Sunday )
  • Brunch even ( Hopefully you made reservations weeks prior )
  • Star gazing at night ( Nightly walk )

As for what to do with your partner, you can pretty much so the same thing and add a romantic twist. I plan to also buy flowers and chocolates for my best friends because the point of this holiday is to show your loved ones how much you care and appreciate them.


I am also not too big on Single's Party because I always got the vibe that a bunch of single people come together and be mad at being single and mad at people in relationships when there is nothing wrong with being single; it's a time to work on yourself. When I saw work on yourself I mean find a new hobby, meditate, figure out things about yourself you probably wouldn't have in a relationship to list a few. That is only my opinion on Single's Parties. I could be speaking rubbish. I'm sure there are many people who have tons of fun at those parties because it is still a party at the end of the night.

The year before last year, I bought a bag of Hersey’s chocolates and gave a Hersey’s kiss to all my friends at school. It was really sweet and thoughtful of me and it felt good to share with everyone. I even received some chocolates too which never really happened to me when I was growing up.

I am also aware that some of the suggestions I made such as movies and dinner may not be the best unless you plan ahead at least 2 weeks in advance since everyone and their grandmother suggests dinner and a movie. If you planned ahead and made those reservations and bought those Deadpool movie tickets then you should be a-oh-kay.

I think here is a good spot to end things. I am so sorry that I was late with posting this week. I got sick again and was a bit slower with things. I know not a lot of people read my blog but those who do, I really do appreciate it. Thank you for taking the time to read my words.

I hope everyone has a safe and wonderful Valentine’s Day. Love each other, guys.


Until next time, everyone. Take care <3

Friday, February 5, 2016

Clumsy Hero.

Hey Guys!

Hope everyone is doing well.


So one of my best friends brought up this app game called Clumsy Hero and I am totally addicted to it. This is a great game in my opinion for anyone who loves RPG's, grinding to get to the highest level possible, getting into guilds and enjoying all the guild benefits; all the RPG goodies.

I started playing this game yesterday and I am level 13 now. I can say this game is very challenging after a while which makes me want to play more. I was one of those people who loved Maple Story. If any of you guys are not familiar with Maple story, I suggest checking it out.

Nexon also made an app game version of Maple Story for all you Maple Story lovers out there called Pocket Maple Story. It is available on the Google Play store and the App Store for IPhones and it is free just like Clumsy Hero, also free to download.

I say give it a try. I probably might end up doing a small review for Pocket Maple Story once I start playing it more. I've been practically obsessed with Clumsy Hero. I am so happy that one of my best friends brought this game into my life; I've been wanting to play a game like this for a long time now on my phone.

The only down side to this game is that it is one of those games that you do need an internet connection in order to play so if you guys were looking for an RPG to play when traveling on the train underground, this game is not the one. I actually play Slash Tower which is also another free game on Google Play and the App Store. It's an arrow game that progressively becomes more challenging and I highly suggest it.

Alright, everyone, I will end this review here. I do give Clumsy Hero so far a 3.5 out of 5 only because I am not that far into the game yet and I am not sure if there are only three fighting areas that can be unlocked. I have already unlocked the second fighting area and there seems to be only three areas to unlock. I'd probably stick to 3.5 because I think at some point grinding will become more of a thing and I am not too big on grinding but I know tons of people are and if I were, I'd definitely give this game a 4 out of 5.

I will end things here until next time, everyone. Take care <3

Please write down in the comments games that you think I should try out and I will check them out =]

Happy playing, everyone!

Giving Advice. Let's not.

Life will give you opportunities to give you advice. Don't always take those opportunities.

I know there are plenty of people who do not know the difference between giving advice and giving your perspective on a situation. While some people give their opinions on a situation, other may misinterpreted it as giving advice when that was not the person’s intention. All they want to do is share their perspective to open up the conversation to a higher sense of being that plain advice cannot create.

I say this because it is true. Think about it whole-heartedly for a moment as you’re reading this post. Imagine yourself, right now, speaking with a friend who has a problem. Let’s say that Susan saw someone steal something out of her bag and she did not get a chance to stop them. She is clearly mad, pissed off, frustrated, irritated, and probably feeling violated, and etc. If you were to give her advice, you’d be telling Susan what to do in her life.

“Go to the person who stole your stuff and tell them to give it back or just take it back, it’s you possession.”

When giving your perspective on a situation, it sounds, looks, and feels completely different compared to just giving Susan advice and telling her what you think she should do.

“Oh my gosh...when did that happened? Are you alright? Did anyone else see who took your stuff?...I remember the last time something of mine was taken from me. I felt deeply violated and unsafe. I know I held my bag that much tighter for about two weeks because of being paranoid. I ended up never confronting the person because I don’t do too well with confrontations.”

There’s a big difference between sharing with a person and giving advice. When you share your opinions on a situation, your personal experiences, perspectives, and what comes to your mind, you are opening yourself up to so much more outcomes to occur between you and that person. A friendship that was never there could even blossom.

I am writing about this today because a friend of mine is going through a tough situation and she wanted my advice. I did not give it to her. I spoke from experience. I ended up doing what others have done for me in a tough situation which was to take my mind off it and speak about something I was passionate about. That was exactly what I did and it helped my friend a lot. She went home feeling much better which is the goal when you are sad; to progressively feel better.

I felt it was important to make a post about not giving advice because it is always better to open up a bit and share your thoughts and opinions with someone you feel you can trust; you will feel so much better on your end afterwards. Even if you do not know or trust the person, it still does not hurt to speak from the heart because you never know how helpful you may turn out to be for that person. You are broadening that person’s horizons into thinking in a certain way they probably did not think of before making their way to you.

I’ll end things here, guys! Sorry this post was late. I thought I had already typed something up for Thursday but I was wrong. This week for me has been so rocky and all over the place but I am happy to have this blog to have some time to take a break from things and recollect myself.

Those who found their way to my blog, thank you so much for taking the time out to read it. I highly and deeply appreciate it! Please leave comments below to give me ideas on what to write about and/or something you’d like to read about to get a second opinion.



Until next time. Take care <3

Tuesday, February 2, 2016

Being hard on yourself.

Speaking very well from experience, I have been so hard on myself for years.

It actually took me until recently to realize actually, how hard I really was being on myself. It was so bad that it did get to the point that I would internally beat myself up over stuff and it normally had to do with me not getting a grade I considered good enough or if it was a grade I was not used to receiving.

As I mentioned on more than one occasion, I am a recent graduate; I finished my undergraduate program on December 10th of 2015, which is also my birthday. I ended my undergrad by taking a graduate class to get a feel of what graduate school may be like and there is so much pressure because of so little work you are given. The assignments are in bulk. In my class, I was given a power-point presentation that had to be about 30 minutes long and a 10 page paper. It might not sound like a lot of work but once it got closer to the end of the semester, our professor told us that everyone did well on the power-point presentation and that it was not counted towards our final grade; it was a preparation for our papers.

The whole class rode on that one paper.

I couldn’t even remember the last time I felt so much pressure on one paper. I felt absolutely terrible when I saw my final grade online and I got a C. Incredibly discouraging. The moment I saw my grade, I immediately thought that I would never make it into graduate school because my grade for my one graduate class sucks.

It took me about a day to get over the whole ordeal and to remind myself that I have good grades in many other classes that will help me even if my GPA is a 2.9; it wasn’t the end of the world so I had to stop acting as if it was.

Honestly, I am hesitant in going back for a Master’s degree but it would be a huge accomplishment for me and even for my family since no one in my immediate family ever went to school long enough to gain a Master’s degree. So when the time comes that I feel confident enough to apply, I won’t stop until I get accepted somewhere no matter how much of a challenge it may be.

My point is, don’t be so hard on yourselves. You are your number one cheerleader. You are the first person to pick yourself up when you fall. I know for some, including myself, it may be difficult to not be hard on yourself especially when you know you are capable of doing so much better. There are going to be times when you do give it your best and for some reason you do not get the results you thought you were going to get. I believe it is the universe in the works to lead you to where you need to be, not where you want to be. Everyone has some sort of purpose no matter how small it may appear to others. You will not live up to that purpose if you are busy beating yourself up over things and being too damn hard on yourself. You’re human, treat yourself like one.

It took me a lot of meditation and writing to realize how hard I was being on myself and I became much happier when I paid more attention to my internal actions. Sure, I may still be hard on myself from time to time but I am a lot softer than before. It may sound weird but hug yourself, caress and rub your arms from time to time because it is very relieving. It might sound lonely to some but you are your best friend so treat yourself like it and take care of yourself.

One of my close friends would tell me to eat something sweet whenever I was upset about something so try eating a little piece of cake. Those who aren’t the biggest sweet tooth, maybe try something savory, go for you favorite snack, just have a bit and pay attention to how much you’re progressively feeling better.

Be mindful of yourself because you are always going to be first.

I think here is a good place to end things for now. Thank you to those who are reading my posts, I highly appreciate it!
I encourage to leave comments so that I know how you guys are doing and feeling and it will help give me more ideas on what to write for my next post.


Until next time everyone, take care <3